Saturday, 6 December 2014

The Word - Doth protest too much

"These big vagina ladies are getting away with murder."

L.D.: [walking in] Hello! 
Lisa  : Hello. Welcome back. 
L.D.: [enthusiastically] So! You know, I spoke to our mutual friend. [Jeff, concerning the size of his penis] 
Lisa : Did you say hello for me? 
L.D.: I did, I did. I did say hello, and... I couldn't help but mention the... whole kind of..."small penis" thing... It came out. 
Lisa : Oh, my gosh... Was he upset? 
L.D.: Not at all! Not at all...
Lisa : Really?
L.D.: In fact he had a... completely different take on it than you! He said the problem didn't lie with his small penis... but rather, with your... BIG vagina.
[smugly, he makes a wide 'V' symbol with his hands]
Lisa : Is THAT what he did? 
L.D.: Yeah!
[sign again]
L.D.: BIG! 
Lisa : THIS is my vagina? 
[nodding smuggly]
L.D.: Huge! 
Lisa : Are you kidding? I don't have a big vagina! 
L.D.: [grinning smugly with condescending eyes] You've got the huge vagina. 
Lisa : Oh, do I? 
L.D.: [nodding] You got the huge vagina. You're blaming the small penis... It's not necessary. 
Lisa : I made a little... You're the one that-! 
L.D.: [cutting Lisa off] METHINKS the lady doth protest too much! Hmph!   [making the sign]
Larry David &Lisa Thompson (Mo Collins)   
'Curb Your Enthusiasm' Season 5 Ep 08 - The Ski Lift)

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